Mastering the Art of a Selfie - Beauty and the Pitch

This past summer I gained a new obsession…myself. JUST KIDDING. Slightly. I did however, go on a one month technology hiatus and upon return I realized a) my hair has grown like a lot. I’m no scientist but I am sure it had something to do with the lack of brain cells being destroyed because of constant phone to face action (or not) and b) I friggin suck at taking photos 1980s style sans instant digital reproduction to show if my finger is covering the screen (almost always, why do I have fat fingers?), if the photo is blurry (indeed), and if I’m even focusing on the right items (selfie with Kodak fail).

To redeem myself as a self-proclaimed photographer, a genius with an eye for detail and Instagram mastermind with an appreciation for unique beauty (hello confidence-slightly-borderline-cocky) I became my own subject and learned how to take the best photos. Naturally one would think I practiced with my pup, Benji, but he moves around and doesn’t smize on point so, the easier option was myself. Here are the tips I’ve picked up along the path of ‘selfie-discovery:’

1. Smile

2. Animal in selfie – big plus. Why do you think I own a pet?

3. Look at camera hole. Not the screen.

4. Know what your fine print reads i.e. “my hair so ugly” is not cool when you have the best curls in Texas humidity or my favorite “LOLZ I look like a sweaty horse galore” like we get it girl, you work out. (note: This does not apply if your workout buddy takes it of you and sends to the world, in that case… do you girl and thank your friend later)

5. I CAN’T AVOID THE DUCK FACE DANGIT. I am one of those girls. But for good friend viewing only…sometimes.

6. Avoid zooming up to only one feature. That’s creepy.

7. Downward angle, not to be confused with I-can-see-up-your-nose- angle. See above.

8. Insert arm into picture

9. Show a teensy weensy bit of the background

10. Sprinkle in friends to make it look like you are having a great time

11. AND BONUS – don’t take it too seriously. You do not (should not, will not) make it your LinkedIn profile pic in the near-or far- future.